A ramble through the crowded mind of a book blogger…
1. Book post arrives
Hark! Is that the thud of a parcel landing on my doormat? Rushes excitedly to door and spots book shaped padded envelope. Does joyful dance. Rips open parcel in eager anticipation.
Looks at shiny new book. Strokes cover of shiny new book. Feels ecstatic about receiving this beautiful creation. Publishers love me. Can’t wait to read.
Realisation that am going to have to wait. Have publication dates approaching for many books on my TBR mountain. Have had some of those must read books on my TBR mountain for months.
Rearranges TBR mountain. Adds new book. Wonders how many books can read this week. Cancels all social plans.
2. No book post arrives
Hears postman at door. No satisfying thud on doormat. Stares diconsolately at non book post. Feels dark, empty sadness.
Publishers hate me. My reviews are no good.
Distracts self by browsing twitter. Wonders why have not been sent book everyone I follow is tweeting about receiving.
Brief moment of relief that my TBR mountain has not grown. Determines to read faster. Reminds self of every positive comment ever received about reviews.
Wonders if publisher would send book if asked. Stalks publicist on twitter.
3. Publishes new book review
Wonders if review does book justice. Agonises over star rating on popular sites. Wonders if review explains star rating. Hates star rating system.
Worries about tagging author in tweet. Wonders if author will read review and consider point of book missed.
Why has author not retweeted review? Author hates review.
Author tweets thanks for review. Joy! Realises author says same lovely thing to every reviewer.
Why has publisher not retweeted my link? Publisher hates review. Wonders if publisher will ever send books again.
So many people have retweeted my link! Feels love for the book blogging community. Feels guilt for not personally thanking everyone. Wonders if will ever be retweeted again.
Rereads review. Spots error / clunky phrase / repeated words. Wonders why considers self writer.
4. Reads review of book by other blogger
Did we read the same book? Wishes I had thought of that turn of phrase. Spots publisher retweeting and quoting review. Worries my reviews are no good.
Reminds self of every positive comment ever received about reviews. Retweets other blogger’s review.
5. Asked to take part in blog tour
Requests guest post. Asked for ideas for guest post. Active and imaginative mind goes entirely blank.
Submits idea for guest post. Worries that author will hate idea. Worries that readers will not see funny / perceptive / thought-provoking side of author because of dull idea.
Reads other guest posts on blog tour. Why did I not think of that idea?
Wonders if publisher will ever send books again.
6. Visits bookshop
Shiny new books! Selects a dozen must reads. Reminds self of size of TBR mountain. Reminds self that haven’t read last dozen books bought. Puts all books back. Feels sad.
Selects just one book to buy and feels virtuous. Adds book to TBR mountain, non priority pile. Wonders if life will be long enough to find time to read new book.
7. Friend asks for book recommendation
Momentarily speechless with excitement. Provides list of awesome, must read books that would last slow reading friend a decade.
Remembers to ask what sort of books previously enjoyed. Offers smaller selection.
Feels guilty for not including amazing book from indie press / lesser known author / publisher who sends me all the best books.
Wonders why friend not telling me how much they enjoyed books recommended. Discovers they have not yet got around to buying them all. Tries to understand.
8. Choosing a birthday present for a friend
Has excuse to buy books! Spends hours checking back on every book read in past year. Selects a dozen that friend will absolutely adore.
Checks bank balance. Removes most of the books. Feels sad.
Spends next year wondering why friend is not raving about awesome books received. Remembers not everyone wants to talk books at every opportunity.
9. Asked to produce Christmas gift list
Sits down with favourite pen and notebook bought at great expense from lovely bookshop. Writes down titles of all books not received in book post. Adds all books recommended by friends. Adds book leant to former friend and never returned.
Ignores pointed comments from nearest and dearest on already tottering TBR mountain. Ignores request for non book related items.
Tries to be stoical about books not received.
10. Runs out of bookshelf space
Decides to cull books. Looks at titles where multiple copies owned. Recognises importance of keeping both ARCs and final copies. Admires paperback edition containing quote from my review.
Gives away books didn’t enjoy or am never likely to read again.
Thinks of books given away and regrets loss.
Comforts self by buying more books. Feels happy with no furniture in house other than bed, bookshelves, and chair in which to read.